Why do we keep repeating the same relationship patterns, even if they hurt?

Because our heart is trying to heal what our mind didn't understand.

When we repeat a pattern, it's not because we're broken — it's because we're trying to get a different outcome from something familiar. We stick with what we know, even if it causes pain, because change feels scary.  

💔Here are a few reasons this cycle repeats:

~ Unresolved wounds from past relationships or childhood keep pulling us toward familiar dynamics.
~ Lack of awareness — we don't see the pattern until we're deep in it.
~ Stories we tell ourselves — "I'm not enough," "I don't deserve better," "Love means sacrifice."
~ Fear of the unknown — even an imperfect known feels safer than the risk of something new.
~ Desire for healing through relationships — we hope the next partner "fixes" what was broken before.

🫶 But here's the good news: You can break free. Here's how to start:

~ Notice your pattern — write it out. See the steps you go through (attraction, conflict, retreat, repeat).
~ Name your pain behind it — what fear or wound is being triggered?
~ Question your stories — ask, "Is that really true? What if there's another way to see this?"
~ Experiment with small acts of difference — share a boundary. Speak your needs. Pause instead of reacting.
~ Choose someone safe — a coach, therapist, trusted friend — and say: "Help me see myself differently."

Let me ask you:

👉 Which step feels hardest for you — awareness, naming, questioning, acting, or asking help?

If you're ready to go deeper and transform your patterns, let's work together. DM me today and let's set up a session✨

Coach - Marta ❤️
📩 coaching@malagaminds.com

#relationships #lifecoach #malaga #relationshipcoach